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Speechless about supporting bootlegs

blueraibluerai hace 2 añosAsk MFC
I just feel like I really have to get this of my chest right now since it's been bothering me quite a bit.

Last night, I was voice-chatting with my boyfriend and another friend of mine. We were talking about all sorts of things but then suddenly we rolled into the subject about figures. I was telling them that I just recently ordered and paid a highly anticipated figure of mine (ITEM #116883) and that I was super exited to finally get my hands on this figure. My friend then asks me how much the figure ended up costing. I told them the price and their reactions were pretty understandable since it's quite expensive. I continued to say that it was actually a pretty good deal since the figure's price might inflate later, and also cause it was a character I really liked.

After telling them about ITEM #116883, my boyfriend uttered the one thing that caused my head to spin around and kick itself out of orbit or something:

"Why not buy a bootleg instead? It's much more cheaper and its probably the same thing anyways cause it's just plastic. And if we support the bootleg industry, maybe they will improve?"

My boyfriend is well aware of the fact that I collect figures, and that I really respect the hobby itself and choose not to buy bootlegs. The one thing I'm aware of right now is that my boyfriend doesn't really respect my hobby. This isn't the first time he's made negative comments about my hobby, since he's always telling me that it's a waste of money once we bring up the subject. I can understand why he thinks that since he hasn't really had that much money when he was growing up and only decides to buy things that he considers necessary.

I guess it just saddens me how little respect he actually has to the hobby and me collecting it when he expects me to start buying bootlegs just because it is cheaper.

I told him that the bootleg industry is just something that shouldn't even exist since they just copy somebody else's work and sell it as their own. The quality is poor and it's not even near the real thing. And besides, if everyone were to support the bootleg industry and not the authentic one, who would come up with new designs and ideas for the bootlegers to steal? The bootleg industry is still alive cause there is always some new idea to "steal". The thought of supporting this sort of industry is just a dreading thougt for me.

He didn't give a rat's ass about what I told him and my other friend in the conversation agreed with him. After that conversation, he told me something even more dreadful. He ordered a figure that he knew was a bootleg from eBay!
Like, seriously? Sure, It's his money and all and it's up to him how he spends it but at that moment, it just felt like some sort of protest against me. That he bought it just to make me angry or something and to "prove" his point.

This whole thing has given me uneasy thoughts and I really want him to understand that this is a hobby I love. Even if it's just a teeny weeny little piece of understanding, I would honestly be really grateful for that. I don't feel like bringing up the subject anytime soon. I guess I just need more strength to break his stubborn wall of ignorance about bootlegs.

So fellow collectors, what would you do if you were in my position?

(If something is left unclear, just ask and I'll answer as good as I can.)

EDIT:
Thank you all for your comments! I feel like I have a big family supporting me here! ~ (●´∀`●)
All of you had something useful to say and I've read every single one of them. I guess I was just desperate and needed some ideas to mend my own problems. All of you have sparked a thought in my head and pretty sure I'll be able to confront him when possible. But at the end of the day, if he can't respect my hobby, then he doesn't respect me. If that's nothing I can fix then I guess it never was meant to be fixed and we won't be able to continue happily with our relationship. I might give an update about how he responds to my confrontation.

UPDATE
He's still as stubborn as ever. He claims that he has respect for me having the hobby but he will still defend the bootlegs, whether it's about airsoft or even figures. He's always been a cheapskate I suppose. He also said that the fact that he bought the bootleg right after our conversation was just cause he wanted one and that it had nothing to do with proving a point.

All I can say now is that I'm quite angry and sceptical since he claims that he supports my hobby when I ask him, but it sure doesn't feel that way. I remember when I told my parents about this hobby and wanted them to accept it. Now I can really feel the support from them, and I trust the fact that they respect me and my hobby. It's the total opposite when my boyfriend tells me he supports my hobby.
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Comentarios interesantes
30pt
If you've already talked about how much you respect this hobby and how much bootlegs bother you, and he's AWARE that this kind of thing makes you upset, then I'm sorry but your bf's a douche. If I were in the same position then I'd seriously re-evaluate the relationship because someone (especially a SO) going out of their way to provoke me is a big no-no.

...unless he truly just wanted a cheaper copy for himself. In that case it's his money and he can do what he wants. And if he regrets then that's his own problem too. Tho maybe you can gloat a little. XD

The bootleg market will exist whether you bf contributes or not since there's obviously a demand for knockoffs (for various reasons), so unless he's rubbing your face in his pro-bootleg opinion, I think you should just agree to disagree.
hace 2 años
17pt
I dunno. I get it, and I wouldn't personally buy bootlegs, but at the same time it's kind of like... well, I'm not going to act morally superior for not doing so. I mean, almost everything you consume has been ripped off from someone else - the clothes you wear were originally designed by one person and then other companies took the designs and sold them as their own. The meals you eat at restaurants were originally created by one person and then other people decided to cash in as well. Gaming consoles, furniture, drinks, movie plots, toys, makeup, cars. They all copy one another.

I know it's not exactly the same, but in the same way that I wouldn't buy a jacket for $5000 just because it's from the original designer, I can understand why someone who doesn't particularly care about figure collecting would not spend $100+ on a piece of plastic just because it's from the original manufacturer.

If he's buying bootlegs just to bug you, that makes him an asshole. But the act of buying bootlegs, in and of itself, does not.
hace 2 años
Recent Comments
1pt
Some people just don't quite understand and I don't blame them. I never bought a bootleg before as they look terrible/deformed in my opinion. But to some people, they only want to pay a small amount to have a token of their favorite character. Having legit just doesn't seem as important for them. To them, a figure is just a physical representation of their favorite characters.

He just needs time to be exposed to the legit figures. For newbies especially, bootlegs are attractive alternatives. They don't want to pay a lot yet they want the characters.
I would recommend you to slowly show him bits by bits your legit collection. Subtly hint the quality differences...etc.

Also if bootlegs do improve, so will their price. So it will ends up the same thing. Except you just need to pay extra to have the real deal (not to mention, the proud feeling of calling yourself a legit collector).

For someone who grew up in a more miser environment, his reaction is totally normal. You just have to accept that he is that way. After all, a relationship requires mutual acceptance. :)
hace 2 años
0pt
I read your update it made me sad and sigh..I not surprise for some people like him who is Cheap to keep buying cheap and bootleg figures.. :T
I really glad for your family who support you. ^^
hace 2 años
13pt
kilani Sayaka Rank
Both of you should respect each other. If he wants to use his own money to purchase a bootleg figure, that is his decision, as is your own to not.

I find it an extreme over-reaction to suggest breaking up with your partner over what I consider a small argument. People can be incredibly stubborn to accept ideals other than their own, none of the users here are directly involved in your relationship so we can't say if he is really being respectful or not. You need to especially be considerate that this person spent decades being raised and adapting to believe and behave a certain way that may not match with you, this is where you need to both teach and have some acceptance of your own.

As I don't collect anymore, I now better understand why a non-collector would have such concerns or ideas. My family and friends often felt the same way, and I have just accepted that it's okay for them to have their own thoughts on it, as long as they respect me in a general form.

Your loved ones need to respect you, not necessarily your hobby.

Anyway, good luck.
hace 2 años
1pt
sarunamirabu married to Ookurikara
ipwnboyz (hace 2 años) #2655845Your call, but to dump a person you probably share many interest with over one argument is pretty extreme if you ask me. That's the whole point of being a relationship. He isn't you, and may not agree with everything you say, yet, you need to find the courage to look beyond that and appreciate him for his many other qualities.
I wouldn't date someone who is so intent on supporting bootlegging in the first place tbh. That may be odd to some but I just wouldn't be able to.
hace 2 años
9pt
sarunamirabu (hace 2 años) #2655796At that point I would question my relationship and probably dump the person :'/
Your call, but to dump a person you probably share many interest with over one argument is pretty extreme if you ask me. That's the whole point of being a relationship. He isn't you, and may not agree with everything you say, yet, you need to find the courage to look beyond that and appreciate him for his many other qualities.
hace 2 años
0pt
sarunamirabu married to Ookurikara
ipwnboyz (hace 2 años) #2655594I'll play along and would probably reply something like:
"I sure hope they can do it better, and if that's the case, then I might even consider buying from them." x)

At that point I would question my relationship and probably dump the person :'/
hace 2 años
3pt
sarunamirabu (hace 2 años) #2655493I am very well aware that this is the absolute wrong response to give to someone like this, but honestly my instant response if someone tried to argue that to me would be "If you ever create something in the future, I hope someone else steals it from you and sells copies of it and makes lots of money off of it and let's see how you like it".
I'll play along and would probably reply something like:

"I sure hope they can do it better, and if that's the case, then I might even consider buying from them." x)
hace 2 años
8pt
sarunamirabu married to Ookurikara
I am very well aware that this is the absolute wrong response to give to someone like this, but honestly my instant response if someone tried to argue that to me would be "If you ever create something in the future, I hope someone else steals it from you and sells copies of it and makes lots of money off of it and let's see how you like it".

I don't /actually/ wish that upon anyone and I wouldn't be /serious/ when I say that, but sometimes if you say something terrible like that to someone they might actually comprehend things a little better.

I won't comment about how wrong the whole hobby criticizing thing is since I think that's really just self-explanatory that no one really approves of that sort of attitude here.
hace 2 años
3pt
katsudon Play-Along Tsukkomi
This might be the time to abandon ship. It's hilariously petty that he bought a bootleg off of ebay just to prove his 'point'- not even sure if your words are going to reach him, but I don't fault you for trying. Best of luck to you.
hace 2 años
1pt
I don't knowingly support bootlegs myself - I actually have a friend who just recently got a new job and might end up starting down the road of figure collecting, so I've been coaching him on the finer points of starting his collection. Hopefully, he won't accidentally buy a bootleg, but I've told him that he can come to me with any questions he may have in order to avoid such a purchase.

With that being said, I don't think my friend would buy a bootleg on purpose (he is a little iffy about spending a lot of money on things, but his moral compass points in all of the right directions), but I mean... I suppose you can't stop some people from doing certain things. Of course, it's quite annoying when people are close-minded or don't understand the effects of their actions and it results in their ignorance. It's even more annoying when they make a point to "get back at you" by doing something that is clearly unnecessary and out of spite... if he remains unmoved in understanding your side of the story, then I would say he isn't worth the trouble.

Talk to him about it, if possible. I believe that's all you can do at this point.
:/
hace 2 años
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